Erased
by YourPinkDiary
Summary: Robin reluctantly agrees to a potion that will make him forget Regina in order to unfreeze Marian. But the heart has a way of seeking out what it wants.
1. Part 1

**A/N: I already posted this on tumblr, but because it's a three part fic, I wanted to post it here as well.**

**Hope you enjoy. **

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><p>Regina took a deep breath, and with shaky hands added the last ingredient to the potion. It swirled and shimmered a deep blue.<p>

She stepped away from the bench and tried to take steadying breaths.

This was it.

The potion was complete. Robin was due to arrive any minute and then… It would all be over.

'Regina.' His rich voice spoke softly.

Regina spun around to face him. Suddenly blinking back tears. This was one of the last moments she would have with him whilst he still remembered. Very soon everything they'd had would be lost.

'The potion just needs a few more minutes to settle, and then it will be ready.'

He swallowed thickly. He wasn't for a second taking his eyes off her. Off the woman he loved. Because he was all too aware that shortly he wouldn't remember loving her at all.

'Are you sure… Are you sure there is no other way?' He asked.

'I've looked at every avenue.' Regina said. 'If you want your wife back, this is the only way.'

Recklessly Robin closed the space between them significantly.

'I don't want to forget you.' He said.

'I know… I know you don't. But…' She trailed off. Her unspoken words didn't need to be said.

'Regina I… I love you.' He said. 'I love you with a depth I didn't know was possible and I…' He grasped her chin gently with his hand, forcing her to look at him because she had to know. She had to. Confident she wasn't going to look away he caressed her cheek, thumb lightly stroking her cheek bone. Tears were welling up in both their eyes and they let them. 'I want you to know that you have been accepted. There is not a part of you I don't love. The lost broken woman you have been. The evil queen… Especially the evil queen. Oh how I would love to know what our interactions would have been like had we met back then.'

She let out a breathy, forced laugh. 'I would have killed you without a second thought.'

He shook his head. 'No, I don't believe that. I would have charmed you. It's written in the stars. But her… I accept. And I accept and love the woman in front of me. You are stronger than any person I have ever met and anyone who can't see that is a damn fool. You have persisted were others would have broken. You've been to hell and back and yet here you are… The fact you are doing this, for me, only makes me love you more. I do not want to forget you. I do not want to forget what we have, what I feel for you.'

Then don't! Her mind screamed out to him. She could never say it out loud though. He could change his mind. He could choose her instead.

He wouldn't.

'My heart chose you, Regina.' He said. 'Please know… I long for things to have gone any other way.'

'I…' She paused for a moment. She had never said the words out loud to him. She knew he knew. But if she was ever going to say it. Now was the time. 'I love you too.' She said.

The relief and warmth that flooded into his eyes was worth it. She soaked it in. Determined to remember this. That someone actually could look at her like that again.

'May I kiss you?' He asked. 'One last time. Please?'

How could she say no? He might believe her to be strong. But she wasn't that strong.

He leant down and pressed his lips against hers. It took less than a second for both of them to deepen the kiss. Robin's arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her as close to him as he possibly could. At the same time her hands were in his hair, her mind alight as she committed the feeling of his body against her to memory. She soaked in the taste of his lips. She didn't want it to end. Ever.

But it had to.

She pulled away first. He instinctively followed her, pressing a final few light kisses to her mouth. Until she stepped back completely, creating what felt like a vast distance between them.

They both knew the crevasse was only going to grow.

'Ok.' She turned her back to him, facing the potion instead. 'So the way this works is you will forget everything about me. You'll still remember everyone returning to the enchanted forest, you'll remember the time we spent there, Zelena, coming back here of course. Marian returning. But I won't be a part of that. You'll remember the evil queen. But not… me.' She tried to keep her voice steady. But there was no denying the slight shake in her voice.

'And I'll be able to wake Marian up?' He asked.

She turned back to him. Holding the small vial filled with the potion.

'That I still cannot guarantee. But chances are… Yes. Not remembering me means you never fell in love with me. Which means in theory, you should still be in love with your wife. The kiss should work.'

She stepped forward and pressed the vial into his hands.

'I'm going to go step outside. It will probably be quite confusing for you to encounter me straight away. You may also believe I was the one to curse Marian so… I'll keep watch. Make sure nothing goes wrong.'

Robin nodded.

Regina went to step past him and he grabbed her hand.

She looked at him.

'I love you.' He said, one last time. His heart pounding wildly in his chest.

She nodded. 'I love you too. Goodbye.'

She hated how final it actually was.

Regina stepped outside the library. She took deep, steadying breaths. She wouldn't cry. She was not going to cry over this. Not anymore. She had accepted weeks ago she had lost him. This was just more… inal.

Some time later Robin and Marian walked out of the library. Hand in hand. Smiling.

She magicked herself home. And though she said she wouldn't cry she did. She let her soul grieve what had been lost long into the night.


	2. Part 2

**A/N: I'm a horrible person - but I couldn't help but smile at how many of you were reduced to tears reading the previous chapter. This one should be happier. Robin will ****_always_**** be drawn to Regina. I haven't had a chance to reply to any of, but I will in the next few days. **

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><p>Regina had had to act quickly and smartly. Lest Marian start asking Robin questions he wouldn't understand. About her. About him and her. So, the next day she had Mary Margaret pull Marian away from her happy little family in the diner, telling her something about an official mayoral welcome, only to meet Regina outside.<p>

'You.' Marian said, her eyes narrow and suspicious. 'What are you doing here? He saved me with true loves kiss you know? Whatever the two of you had was meaningless.'

The remarked burned. Regina knew it had been anything but meaningless, and the mere thought of someone thinking so little of what they had hurt. But she couldn't let Marian of all people see that.

'Relax.' Regina scoffed. 'I just wanted to let you know that… your precious husband has no memory of his relationship with me.'

'What?' She asked.

'He knows about as much about me as you do. I'm the evil queen, the one who terrorised villages and tortured hostages. No more no less. Though I hope someday you will both start to see who I am now. The two of you will be very happy together I'm sure.'

'How? I don't understand.'

Regina ever so briefly wondered if this was why Robin was unable to fall back in love with his wife on his own accord. The girl's questions were irritating. Regina felt as though she had said everything she needed to. But she also knew she couldn't afford to think that way. She needed to start dismissing all thoughts of Marian and Robin, in any capacity. The sooner this conversation was over, the better.

Regina waved a hand. 'It doesn't matter how, or why. It is what it is. Please do not bring it up with him as you will just confuse him.'

'What did you do to him?' Marian demanded.

'Only what was necessary to save you.' Regina said. 'It is definitely not necessary for you know the details. Just know it was with saving you in mind, so, you're welcome.' The last part was said with a bite of sarcasm that went largely unnoticed by both Marian and Mary Margaret.

Marian nodded. 'He really doesn't remember you?'

'No.'

'And Roland?'

'Does. But I'm sure he's just happy to have his mother back. I doubt it's much of an issue.'

Marian still looked at her warily. But eventually nodded. 'Ok. Thank you for helping to save me.'

Regina couldn't bring herself to say the words you're welcome sincerely. So said nothing as she watched Marian walk back into the diner to join her family again. She could feel Snow's sympathetic gaze.

'Don't.' She growled. 'I do not want your pity.'

She stormed away. Thankfully the girl had enough sense to not follow her.

…

It was a week after rescuing his wife from the curse that had befallen her he spotted the woman.

He was picking up a coffee for himself before a meeting to discuss the Snow Queen situation the town found themselves in. As he and his Merry Men were still inhabiting the same forest the Snow Queen had taken up residency in, he had insisted he be part of the meeting to discuss what they were going to do about her. Marian and Roland were back at the campsite enjoying some time together. He was going as the leader of his men. He had a duty to protect them, and his wife and son. Therefore, anything he could do to help he would.

He stepped into the diner, and standing by the counter was a woman.

As soon as he saw her he felt as though the wind had been drawn from his lungs. It was such an odd reaction to seeing a person that for several moments he wasn't sure what was happening. He'd never experienced something this instant before. As though deep down his soul knew what was happening and was anticipating it in a way his mind was unable to comprehend.

She had her back to him. Dark hair stopped at her shoulders, with an outward flick. She wore a shirt that emphasised the curve of her waist and a skirt that hugged her hips. She was small in frame, but he could tell that wasn't something to hold her back.

She was stunning.

And he hadn't even seen her face.

Unable to help himself (and he was supposed to head towards the counter anyway, how else would he place his order?) he stepped up beside her.

'Fine day isn't it milady?' He asked her, heart hammering as he waited for her response.

He felt her suddenly tense up, he could somehow sense, every fibre in her body suddenly on edge. Because of him? The reaction was a strange one. She looked up at him and he lost himself completely.

She had the darkest, most stunning eyes. They were framed by long, dark lashes and hints of dark makeup that emphasised the layers of different browns and blacks in her eyes. And her lips… Deep, deep red, and full, a scar hovered just above them, and he almost needed physical restraint to stop himself from reaching out and tracing it with his finger, ask her for the story. Suddenly he was imagining how her lips would feel under his. They would be soft, and warm, inviting. He got the sense she would be someone who kissed with every fibre of her being and the thought was doing things to him.

She looked so familiar. But he couldn't…

'You're the Queen.' He stated. Suddenly realising why she looked familiar. She was… they called her evil. He would wait and see if she was deserving of the title. The woman before him did not look like the ruthless sorceress from the tales he had heard.

A sudden despair filled her eyes, along with the slightest hint of tears welling up. Had he said something wrong? He felt like he was the reason for the sudden anguish on her face and he didn't enjoy that one bit. Whatever he had done- he would do everything in his power to undo it.

'Long ago, yes.' She said.

'But not anymore?' He asked.

'There are no kings and queens in this world.' She said softly.

'What do I call you then, your majesty?' He asked.

A coffee was place on the counter in front of her. She picked it up.

'Nothing. You call me nothing.'

He watched her leave. Completely entranced by her.

He would find out more about her. That he was certain of. He needed to. It felt so necessary, crucial, that he found out as much about the stunning woman as he could.

'Do I need to remind you you were in here just yesterday with your wife and child?' His head snapped back over to Granny.

'What?'

'Marian. Your wife?'

Oh… right… How was it that in several minutes of completely drinking in the woman Marian had not crossed his mind once? What kind of husband was he? He was clearly still adjusting to her being back, after having spent so many years without her, grieving her, trying to move on from her. That was… understandable, right?

'Of course. I just… was stunned to see the Queen. Is all.'

Granny gave him a look that told him she did not believe him for a second, but she didn't press the matter any further.

'You'll get used to it.' She said. 'What can I get you?' She asked.

He placed his order. As he waited, the queen remained on his mind. He had heard many a story about her. Had been told many times that she as terrifying, but beautiful.

They had most definitely downplayed her beauty. That was for sure.

He felt awful about it, but he couldn't get his mind off the woman his whole way to the sheriffs office. How was it that the evil queen had been living in this town and he hadn't seen or heard of her at all? He may not have been part of the first curse, but he'd been in Storybrook for months, and no one had ever thought to mention to him that the 'evil' queen was one of the residents. The whole thing felt so odd.

'You'll get used to it' granny had said. Why then, wasn't he already used to it after months of being in this town?

Mind still on her, he wasn't expecting her to be part of the small group gathered in Emma and David's office to talk about the situation at hand. In fact, she was standing at the front of the room. Next to Emma. As though she was one in charge?

Had the woman just appeared out of nowhere that morning?

Their eyes met briefly and she turned away from him. The movement made his heart ache somewhere deep down. How was she causing him such reactions?

Had she cursed him long ago and this was the remainder of it?

She was whispering something in a harsh tone to Snow, who nodded. She then cleared her throat.

'We need to discuss the matter of stopping the Snow Queen from shattering her mirror. If she does, there's no knowing what will happen.'

'Actually there is.' Emma cut in. 'Everyone except myself and Elsa will die.'

'That is what she wants. We don't know whether it is what she will get.' Regina said firmly, taking charge once more. 'Tomorrow I will be venturing out to the forest to put a protection charm on the mirror. This should hopefully bide us some time.'

'Regina, you're not going alone are you?' Snow asked her.

'It's a dangerous undertaking, and I will not be putting anyone in danger.'

'I will go with you.' The words fell from Robin's mouth before he could stop them.

Regina's eyes snapped to him quickly. Her gaze was harsh and cold. But somehow he just knew it was a front. A front for what, he didn't know yet. But he would find out.

'You most certainly will not.' She demanded. 'You have a family to take care of.'

He was momentarily stunned. How did she know that? He had not encountered her at all before today. Yet here she was knowing he had a family. What else did she possibly know about him?

'I agree with Regina.' Snow White said- and it was so strange to him to see fair Snow White talking to the queen as though there weren't years of being hunted down by her. He clearly had missed some important, pivotal things. 'Robin, you have your own duties to tend to. But… Regina, you shouldn't go alone.'

'I will be fine.' She said firmly. 'Emma, you will need to lure her out under the pretence of wanting to discuss the matter of family. Make sure she is in town. And I will go and do what I can to protect the mirror a little longer from breaking to give us more time to figure out the next move.'

She didn't leave much room for discussion and the meeting was soon adjourned. She would be going to the Snow Queen's cave alone the next day.

Though he couldn't fathom why, Robin didn't like that at all.

…

He spent a night dreaming of her. His dreams felt foggy, and even more out of reach than dreams typically were. They were in a room in the middle of a forest, sitting on a couch, a glass of wine each. She was caressing his wrist, the one with his family's lion crest inked permanently onto his skin. She was whispering something to him about it and it was making his heart leap at the thought.

But he couldn't make out the words. He only knew they were important.

When he woke in the morning it was to his little boy staring at him.

'Morning Papa.' Roland said grinning.

'Morning.' He looked around- Marian wasn't in the tent.

'Can we go and get ice cream with R'Gina today?' He asked.

'What?' Robin frowned. Why would they get ice cream with the queen? 'Why-'

'Please? You promised we would.'

'I…' He had no memory of this at all. What a strange thing for him to promise his son.

'Roland- come and help me with the fire.' Marian stepped into the tent briefly. Roland looked up at his mother and nodded. As he slipped past her outside Marian met Robin's gaze. 'Sorry, we ran into her a few days ago and Roland was quite taken with her son. I've tried explaining to him that she's a very busy woman and he may have to go for ice cream with Henry without her. But he is stubborn. Like his father.'

Robin simply nodded. As soon as Marian left the tent once more he frowned. Roland hadn't mentioned Henry.

And wasn't Henry Emma's son?

He was suddenly hit with the memory of yesterday's discussion. That the queen would be venturing to the Snow Queen's cave, alone.

He suddenly knew what he was doing that day. She wouldn't be alone if he could help it.

…

Seeing him had been much harder than she had ever anticipated.

The way he looked at her… As though he understood her, but didn't understand why that was so. And as though… she swallowed thickly… as though she was beautiful. It was ridiculous. He didn't remember her. He should have been afraid of her.

But then, she supposed, he never had been to begin with.

Her reasons for being alone on her quest to the Snow Queen's cave had little to do with her frustration at the incompetence of others, for once. And had more to do with the fact that since Robin took the potion alone time had been lacking. Everyone was worried about her. It was unfounded. She was fine.

She would be fine.

Someone was following her. She stopped. Tensing at the thought of it possibly being the Snow Queen herself. Or… worse.

'Reveal yourself.'

Nothing.

She rolled her eyes. 'Reveal yourself now. Or I will force you to.'

He stepped out behind a tree off to her left. He had the grace to wear a sheepish look.

She had to quickly calm the butterflies that erupted in her chest at the sight of him. He had followed her? Why? What did this mean?

'Hello.' He said.

'What are you doing?'

'Well, I didn't intend to be caught.'

She simply stared at him. He was lying. He could have easily gone unnoticed if he'd wanted to.

'I just wanted to make sure you were safe.'

'Why?' Why indeed? He wasn't supposed to care about her anymore. She wasn't supposed to be even a blip on his radar.

'I…' He stopped. 'I don't know.'

'Well it's unnecessary. You can go.'

'What if something happens? Who will send for help?'

'I will be fine.' She said. 'I don't need your help.'

'You have it anyway. And if you do not readily accept I will simply go back to following you hidden behind the trees.'

He had no idea how difficult he was making things for her. That they had this… history. This… connection. And he knew nothing of it, he had no idea she was completely in love with him and could do absolutely nothing about it.

It was hurting her. So much. And she wanted him to just walk away. He'd done before, voluntarily. He took the potion didn't he? Why wasn't he walking away now?

'Fine. But so help me if you get in my way.'

'I wouldn't dream of it, milady.'

Her heart jumped at the name. Just as it had the day before in the diner. She firmly reminded herself of how she was nothing to him anymore. And never would be.

…

They walked in silence for a long time. It was hard for Robin because he had so many questions for her. But he resisted.

Instead he walked alongside her. There was something about her presence that made his heart glow and hurt at the same time.

What spell had she put on him to make him feel this way?

'You know…' He said, finally unable to help himself from talking. 'The more I think about it, the more I question the evil moniker.'

'Why is that?' She asked dryly.

'It just seems like a bit of an overstatement really.'

Her steps faltered. Briefly. But he noticed, and so persisted.

'Bold and audacious, perhaps. But not… not evil.'

Now she stopped completely and turned to face him. He could see the pain in her eyes. Tears welling up and he suddenly felt responsible. What was it that he said that was wrong? He would take them back. He would spend years apologising if only to take the hurt away from her face.

'You will do well to remember that I killed thousands, Thief.' She growled out in a low voice. 'I was ruthless and merciless and if anything… evil was an understatement. If you value anything you will stay away from me.'

He shook his head. 'You are not that woman anymore.'

'You don't know anything about the woman I am.' She turned and resumed walking.

He sighed and followed after her.

He would figure her out soon enough.

…

Watching her wield her magic was most definitely something. She was so strong, and so certain. She was clearly more powerful than he had imagined. Perhaps she was right that she didn't need his help.

He still longed to protect her. Though it may not have been the forest she needed protection for.

On the journey back he made an attempt to talk to her again.

'Why is it I hadn't seen you before two days ago?' He asked.

'What?' She asked, she sounded weary. The cold front was gone.

'You've clearly been here a long time, you're a central part of operations likes this, and you've somehow regained the trust of many people who were wanted by you. I just… how have I not encountered you before?'

She paused mid-step. 'Perhaps because I do not see the point in wasting my time with a thief such as yourself.'

Though the words cut him like a knife, hit him deeper than he thought possible, he still heard the waver in her voice. She tried to be cold and distance. But he knew… though he couldn't explain it, that the words hurt her adjust as much to say as it did for him to hear.

'Ok, I'll let you have it for now. But just know, I will find the real answer. Something is amiss and I will find out what it is.'

'No you will not because there is no answer. Things are exactly as they seem.'

But he didn't buy her lie. He walked with her (exactly two paces behind her actually, and if his eyes wandered down her back, to the curve of her waist and below… well, he was a warm blooded male) back to town, silent again and he took the time to ponder the last few days. Nothing added up. Until two days ago he had never seen the queen, Regina, in person. Of that he was certain, because how could he forget his eyes falling on a face such as hers? But she was clearly a key part if this town… someone people relied on. Even his little boy knew of her. How did Roland know this woman well enough to call her by name but he had not even seen her before?

Something was amiss. He had missed something crucial and everyone but himself seemed to be in on it.


End file.
